Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Wedded Bliss

I don't know if I've mentioned here before that I have a plethora of weddings to attend this year. Next month my best friend from college is getting married, and I'm a bridesmaid in that one. I'm heading to DC in a few weeks for the bachelorette goodness, and I'm up to my ears in planning. We've reserved a room at DC Coast for about 30 girls, but now it's looking like only about half are actually going to attend. This is kind of a bummer, because there is a minimum of $1200 for the room, so the other bridesmaids and I are totally going to eat it. I'm trying to not let it stress me out, because my girl Les would do the same for me. Then one of the girls that I grew up with is getting married this summer, in Pennsylvania, and in September, my girl JR is getting married in Hawaii. The Peanut and I bought our plane tickets this morning for that, and scored such an incredible deal, and we're staying in my officemate's dad's condo (uh, that was convoluted) for next to nothing. This means that there will be plenty of Hawaii money for the important things, like shopping and liquor. Woo.
In any case, all of this wedding mumbo jumbo has me, well, jealous. The Peanut and I have been together for almost five years. We know we're going to get married. Hell, we're damn close to being married now, with the paying of the bills and domestic trials and tribulations and the like. There is just the small issue of the actual, you know, wedding. I'm living vicariously through my girlfriends, all of them. You know sometimes when you have a friend that's getting married and that's all she wants to talk about and you just want to say, Oh my god, there's more to life than your wedding? Yeah, it's not like that at all. It's more like, let me help you. Let me tell you about my opinions on flowers and wine and food and etiquette. Let me live through you, cause it ain't happenin' for me this very moment. I know it will happen soon, and I want to be surprised, but at the same time, just do it, for the love of all that is sweet and holy.
I don't know when I turned into this person. Little known fact, here, people: I was previously engaged. It was a ghetto engagement, sans ring, but honestly? I didn't care. I didn't buy a single bridal magazine. I forgot to tell people. When my then-fiancee would start talking about places and dates and all that, I would zone out. I simply didn't care. When I fled DC for California, thus fleeing the then-fiancee, I didn't mourn the loss of the engagement. Again, I totally didn't care. When the Peanut and I met shortly thereafter, I knew very early on that this was the person I intended to be with the rest of my life. We have a lot of weird circumstances regarding our meeting and subsequent relationship (example: When I moved to CA, with only a suitcase, I stayed with a friend of my sister's near La Jolla for a few months. When I moved into my own place and started working, I met the Peanut and found out that he had grown up next door to where I was staying, and had moved out right before I moved in. Weird, no?). But I still didn't start really thinking about marriage until about three years into our relationship. Where it hit me like a ton of proverbial bricks. And then suddenly, all of our friends were getting married, and I wanted to, too. Badly. I don't want to be that girl who becomes obsessed. I really don't. But it's a hard line to walk. I'm trying, though, Peanut. For real, tho.

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